Once upon a time.

Hi !

I'm wondering if you still remember what you were doing exactly a year ago.

SPM and STPM just started. But as far as my memory serves me, I remember STPM did not begin so early back then. It was just a year ago and it seems so far to me now. It has been a busy weekend for me since last Friday. It has indeed been a very busy period of time for me. As usual, never ending assignments and tests. We'll talk about that some post later. Not now.

I was chatting with my friend, and she brought up his birthday. Without realizing, it has been a year already. I'm not sure a year for what, but yeah, it's a year already since so much has happened I suppose.

One should always be the memory keeper, not being kept by memories. However, I'm always a prisoner of memories. They said don't live in your memories, funny that we're living to create memories. Ironic ? It seems fun to me when you can predict how a person will react, and you know exactly what to say or do to provoke them. I'm not trying to annoy anyone, perhaps, it's the egoistic self that craves to proof that you know someone well.

The thing is, I don't know myself well enough to say or acknowledge that I know another person well. It's too subjective to whether you know a person well or not. I've always know how stubborn I am. But I always manage to surprise myself that my stubbornness is always reaching an all new level again .. and again. Because I dwell on things. And also because things that I dwell on are not just things that I should let go, but also things that I don't have the rights to dwell on. But I just do. And .. part of me doubt that it's about self control.

If I were to write myself a letter, I'd tell myself; Give yourself a break.

And this is what I'll do. Breaking away from all those haunting memories, breaking away from the cuffs of memories. If I'm to help anyone, I, myself is the first person in need of help. I need to pick up the remaining pieces of myself. Shattered not by anyone or anything, but myself. Because honestly, if you ask me. I'm really amazing. Amazing that I'm highly capable of discolouring my own life.

So, don't blame me on what happened. I was a broken piece of parcel forced into your hands. All I did was replacing that parcel with time, pain was necessary. I don't care you're doing well or not, because you have all the time you need to be that person you should without a burden of putting back the broken parcel together.

Love,

Mich

p/s: Happy birthday, a few days in advance.

my missing half

Hi. Lately, I came across this blog post by a very consistent blogger, Shuwen. She shared  her thoughts on what's a friend. You guys should read it ! :) So, might as well expect that this post is something related to the very same issue.   Readers of my blog would be familiar with her, my ultimate bestie of the century. Yes, her. That very same girl who at first impression I thought was quite, well, nerdy. And that very same woman who stuck around with me despite my awfulness, bitchiness-I don't even know if that's a world, but screw it and selfishness. If I have to name one person apart from my family that puts up with all my shits, who else would it be if it's not her ? #HEAR HER SING I don't want to repeat all over again how grateful am I to have her in my life, when I already did in my old post I guess. Lol, it's just that now that she's a few thousand miles away, it makes me realize that how much I miss her and how I've taken her for granted ever since the second we laid eyes on each other, wtf. But yeah, you get what I'm trying to say. 
And given that a small drama came up before she left, so yeah .. 
Hey woman,
I'm sorry you had to, and hopefully will have to, put up with everything that I've put you through and still be there for me. Guess you love sticking your nose at where you shouldn't ! Hah ! You don't get much compliment from me, so might as well print this and frame it up. They said, well the horoscopes said that Capricorn and Leo don't get along. But if you ask me, I'm a tad bit too old for those crap. And the fact is, we're still as awesome as how we used to be right ? 
Things I've always knew and always proud of but never told you are, man, you're beautiful ! :) Inside out. And that you're not fat. Yes, I've been teasing you all these time, all these years ! But no, you're not because you're just you. And I'm sorry it actually hits you badly. You're simply awesome. Really, you're simply very decent. You can be reckless, you can be tubelight, you can be the Nandini who sings super well but whoever and no matter how good you can be at something, you're always you at the end of the day. You don't brag. Maybe that's because you always have the mindset that you're not good enough because there are millions of people out there that is better than you. Above all, you don't look down on anyone. :) It's simply amazing that you're in my life. I'll never want you to leave my life .. haha ! 
And you're like so freaking far away now, the only way to stay connected is through social sites and blahs, blahs ! You think things will remain the same ? Yeah, next year can't come any sooner ! 
Take care of yourself, and never forget yourself or I'll disown you ! Hahaha.
Love you too much :P
XOXO

p/s : Our friendship is a beautifully matured child that takes good care of itself. :)

of delayed post, devours and missings...

Hey peeps! LOL..another rambling post of mine..sigh!  It's 21 December already. 4 more sleeps and it's Christmas!!! Weee...well, i suppose it will be another Christmas with my parents..OTL. But i had an early celebration at my sister's church which was really fun..haha..! Knowing the fact that she actually feels belong there, it warms me up..=)

 Last Wednesday..i went out with my "baby"! i know i know, it's long ago and i actually delayed until now only cram everything in one post..SORRY! 

That's the way

it’s time to realize that

human tend to fall in love with devils

they trace you, found you

and lure you into a world full of illusions they created

until you stumble upon the concrete wall that braces their heart

that’s when you realize they’re never yours

but it’s too late

cause your soul is already theirs

Mich

From tumblr.

i am not giving up on my love!

No! i can't survive without you. i can't live without you! Okay, this sounds dumb enough to be the opening of my post. LOL. But, well, it's true! I bumped into such headlines a few mornings ago...