Changing is good. Knowing you've changed is even better. Unless you've changed not for the better but worse. There's this weird feeling that surges in my mind.
I can't specify what about me has change, but I know there's certainly something about me is different. I can feel it .. I know this sound a tad bit stupid since everything's changing all the time and we're always oblivious to changes most of the time. But this time, it's different.
I've a feeling that the way I feel things is different now. It can be just a temporary thing or .. I don't know .. permanent ?
How does it feel to have this sudden gush of adrenaline that quickens your heartbeat, rushing blood to your cheeks. I miss my old self. The girl who believed in happily ever after stories. I still do believe, just that the stories stop revolving around me .. it's a scene where you watch from far. A glimpse into someone else's life. The first time you fall, it was okay .. all you had to do is gather up yourself and stand even taller. But when it's the second time you fall, it's not okay .. you pick yourself up and you hold tight to yourself. Your mind takes over your heart.
I think I've lost something .. I don't know if it will ever come back ! I don't know if I want it back.