Friday, December 31, 2010

my scarlet letter..

It's the last day of the decade...weee....! 10 years ago, i was just an eight year old child...time flies without mercy. It's really pointless to set any new year resolutions - for me. It's not likely that I'm ever gonna live up to it. But still, life needs goals to charge us with motivations. I will just let what happened remain merely as a memory.

Next year i will be sitting for STPM and study will be topping my list. And if there's anything i need in my studies, it will be Mr. Motivation and Miss Focus. They left me once my last paper during this year's final exam ended! On a long-term vacation i guess...Yes ! I need them very much and hoping that they will end their vacation once school starts with some "souvenirs" !

I don't really think there's anything to hope for for my physical health. Perhaps, my mental health or a.k.a emotional health? I need to gain better control over my mood swings. And next year, aside from emotional breakdowns, there will be stress too ! By now, i guess i have to admit that i'm worst at controlling my emotions and my temper. In fact, they gain full control over me..This is really hilarious, i have to cope with stresses and my own erratic emotions ! Sucks!

Over the year, my friends and i are sort of drifting apart in some ways. I know it's unavoidable, but i figured, i need to spend more time with them instead of just sitting in my own class. Because, my friends are a bunch of mates in this world that accept and like me for who i am. I don't care if they're staying forever or leaving one day, i want to appreciate any single soul that turns up in my life. And...woots...guess what? A BOYFRIEND is in my list this year..ow...c'mon...i don't need one..haha...i want one..! There are times where i want someone i can rely on aside from my best friend and my sister..Someone rank specially in my heart...Awwww.............LOL....Well, just another mission impossible !

Enough of my crappings i guess...lets see my wishlist (and yes, i will keep a list, stay around to watch me fail..=P)

Mission Possible

Mr. Motivation & Miss Focus
Better emotional control
Stay close with my friends
Keep a close in touch with mummy
Get a grip on my self-esteem >.<"
Drive ! Drive ! Drive !
A new purse

Mission Impossible

a boyfriend...weee !
end my stpm gloriously
get a small car ! =D

Interested candidates should submit your resumes a.s.a.p. OTL..haha !

So...this year is indeed drifting to an end. I can't possibly express all my feelings in simple terms or if i try, i guess i will have to pay you guys an lcd screen or a new laptop..=P

Anyways, in case if you're still reading and reach this line..(that's a miracle..=D)

I want to say that, life is really too short for you to say no and in anyways- holding back your truest feelings.


Don't you feel like it was just yesterday when you completed your SPM or STPM ? Or even your convocation? Things are never too late as long as you're still breathing, true enough. But the cruelty of this fact is, you never know when you will have to stop breathing. You never know when your time is up !

Here, as the last post of this year, a deepest bow and sincerest thank you to all my family and friends! Including you who happen to be reading this post too !

I know that sometimes i'm plainly the pain in the ass, but despite that, i'm accepted to this world as who i am.

Life is creation of God and Love is a gift of God.

It's just Mich. No other..=)


Footnote: Weeee, gonna attend another party at another friend's house ! It sounds promising enough ! Pray hard that it all goes on well ! *shouting* HAPPY NEW YEAR TO THE WORLD OUT THERE !!!!!!

Have a blessed year ahead and a brand new chapter of life !!!


#i have no rights in all pictures in this post. all taken from GOOGLE

Monday, December 27, 2010

unforgivable moment

#photo taken by: Fene Ng

There is a knock on the door
No one.
There is this grasp at the heart
No beat.
Stranded in this isolated world of my own,
I can't seem to find my way out..
Struggling is futile,
Escaping is pointless.
The cheering crowd that increase as time ticks by
is deceiving me
If i give in to the illusions you create
It's because i am trapped within my own lies.

There is a silhouette under the moonlight
Nothing much.
There is this sweetness in the air
Nothing else.
Your string of thoughts are ocean-deep
I can't seem to find my way in.
There are questions to be answered and
To be left unasked.
The crowd will have to dismiss themselves;
Though the show never even started.
If the curtains are to fall apart...

The world will see that my illusions and your lies
Will leave my heart wounded.

i don't know what led to this ... i mean know what inspired (OTL) this, but i dunno what led to this emo..Oh well..forget bout' it.
Anyway....this post...seems rubbish-ish (OTL) to me....>.<
plainly trying to express my feelings at this moment. Sigh.

Original time of this blog draft: 26 Dec 10 11.12 p.m.


p/s: a comment will do to cheer me up =P

Saturday, December 25, 2010

the last note..

The last note..

No, it's not another suicidal case here, so don't spread it like a fire ! 2010 is reaching it's end like a song drifting to it's last note. This is what i mean.=) Merry Christmas peeps !! weeeeeee...

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

of delayed post, devours and missings...

Hey peeps! LOL..another rambling post of mine..sigh!  It's 21 December already. 4 more sleeps and it's Christmas!!! Weee...well, i suppose it will be another Christmas with my parents..OTL. But i had an early celebration at my sister's church which was really fun..haha..! Knowing the fact that she actually feels belong there, it warms me up..=)
 Last Wednesday..i went out with my "baby"! i know i know, it's long ago and i actually delayed until now only cram everything in one post..SORRY! 

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

100 Facts About Guys

Some Random Fun Facts About Guys

1. Guys don't actually look after good-looking girls. They prefer neat and presentable girls.
2. Guys love flirts.
3. A guy can like you for a minute, and then forget you afterwards.

Monday, December 13, 2010

how bout' a round of applause?

Hi ya!'s been a long time since i blog about bits of ramblings of my life..Hee, so if you're not interested with me--My life laa.. ! You know better than to continue reading..=) CHRISTMAS's near!! Haha..i got affected by the decorations at Times Square. tee hee. But that place is forever crowded..ish.

haha.. cam-whored while picking up Fene..=D 

Tee...i tied half of my hair up and left the other half down..

Saturday, December 11, 2010

That's the way

it’s time to realize that
human tend to fall in love with devils
they trace you, found you
and lure you into a world full of illusions they created
until you stumble upon the concrete wall that braces their heart
that’s when you realize they’re never yours
but it’s too late
cause your soul is already theirs

From tumblr.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Lend Me Your Hand - Pay it Forward

if you're kind enough,lend me a few minutes, finish this post...=)

Before i begin, let this video do the talking...

[Source: youtube]

So, this is basically what i'm gonna share with you today, Pay it Forward (PIF). Since we were kids

Monday, December 6, 2010

that girl

it's dark outside...
piercing silence creeping near through
the chilly air that embrace me without mercy.
standing in front of the mirror,
i saw her.

the girl that reflects my soul
the girl that hides herself within my reflection
cowering from her unstable emotions,
unable to deceive resentments that are too vivid.

that girl who lives within my reflection
struggling against her erratic emotions,
pathetically controls all untamed desires;
slipping deep into her conscience,
she search for courage to summon
the brittle self-esteem that hardly ever existed.

slowly, it dawns upon me that
the dampness on her face
are tears sliding down my cheeks 
the girl that reflects on my mirror.

inspired by: emo
playing yiruma's in the yellow room album
exact time: 5 december 10 11.08p.m.

the frequent update of my blog briefly indicates that i haven't been studying...argh..! how could that be possible? LOL. 
i have to kill one essay tonight! =D


Saturday, December 4, 2010

i am not giving up on my love!

No! i can't survive without you. i can't live without you! Okay, this sounds dumb enough to be the opening of my post. LOL. But, well, it's true! I bumped into such headlines a few mornings ago...
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