Saturday, January 15, 2011

of tripping and learning, lost and found

Have i been blogging too frequently ? Seeing the number of post on my archive, i guess i am. oh well, typing is one of my favorite way to express my feelings, thoughts etc, etc. The noise of my fingers hitting the keyboard mercilessly actually calms my mind. So, yeah..

  You have no idea how glad I feel about the fact that this week is ending. I'm tired and sick of myself. If life is all about falling down and learn as we fall, I don't think I've ever fallen, not a real bad fall yet. Because I have seen people who had their falls and it was bad. Real bad. Mine ? Perhaps just tripping over something.

   I am protected. It's a fact no matter how I don't want it to be true, I am being protected the moment I breathed  in with my own lungs for the very first time, the moment I let out my very first cry. My family, my friends. But not in all aspects, as there will be things that only me myself can deal with. But I'm never on my own. I always have someone to turn to, the only thing is, I'm too stubborn to spill it out.

   Very rarely, I will sit down and confess my problem or my feelings to my sister or friend but when I really do so, I'm hoping not for a guide but more to someone who will accompany me and listen to what I have to say. Blogging is like another way, not listener but reader.

    I almost tripped, but was immediately held by somewhat, angels in my life. You just don't know how great you're playing your part even by just accepting my awfulness. In the end of the day, I've lost some deceiving feelings and found the real meanings to something I've been holding on. 

#a picture dated back in november

  It was indeed a rough week for me, but the value of this week is too great for me to not love it.

I love you, Nicholas, baby boy ! Thank you for recovering so fast !



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